searchingthrough

sometimes i wish that you’ll see this. because somehow the words would be swallowed back whenever i intend to bring them up.

i don’t want to add on to your troubles for now. and yes i swallowed whatever i want to say again.

initially i told myself that you may have your reasons or it may not be easy for you to reject. i psychoed myself to close one eye.

yes i really enjoyed myself over the long weekend with your company. while walking back, i was recalling the time spent. but at the same time what shouldn’t be reminded came flashing through my mind at the same time.

that was when i realised i can’t be like how i wish i could.

i’m selfish when it comes to such things. certain things i don’t accept to share.

i don’t like and can’t share.

in fact, i hate to share.

but i love you. enjoy times with you by my side. i wish to stay by ur side each time you face a problem. to be there to share you troubles. esp recently when u’re facing problems at work and worries about your car. i know i can’t help you in any way but i just hope that i can do some little things to cheer u up. however, i think somehow i still didn’t succeed. because you seem to be equally troubled everyday. i yearn for your smiles, laughter, crap and your teasing. no matter how things will end up for us, i want you to be happy.

at the same time, thank you for the times that you left me with wonderful memories and the joy you’ve given me in all ways. i really treasure every second that we spend together especially because we have such short time together.

yet i’m in doubt. tell me if i’m wrong. i wish i am.