Filed under: my life:)
this is the first time i’m really feeling scared. the fear is empowering. never did i felt that way before. my heart’s like pounding so quickly. i’m starting to be extra sensitive to sounds, even the sounds of cars on the road in the night. sometimes people shouting from downstairs. these unusal and sudden sounds just freak me out!
night phobia.
when i’m out, i’m afraid that my phone would ring. when i’m home, i’m afraid of sudden sounds. when i see him sleeping, i so afraid that the next moment he would be different. i really never felt so scared before. when i close my eyes and rest, i see the repeat of what happened that day. being left alone in such situation just leave me a bad experience and memory.
i hate this feeling. the feeling of fear. the feeling of being alone at night. even if it means going home alone in the night. walking that same way home. sounds of cars. sounds of the quiet night.
i hope that he would be fine. i want my healthy papa back. seeing him that way, seeing mama’s tears really hurts me. i believe that papa would be fine. i love both of you 
i need time to get back to normal and overcome this. i hope u’ll be there with me.
i misses you so much these days. esp in the night. if only i could have you by my side when i’m sleeping.
- this feeling of fear is killing me -
Filed under: my life:)
it’s a new start and new beginning for everything:)
- the three stars seem to be leading the way -
